Are you self-sabotaging your fitness goals?

I’m referring to the all or nothing mentality that is all too often associated with fitness or diet. This type of self-sabotage is rooted in perfectionism, and experiencing feelings of shame and unworthiness if we don’t meet certain standards. The idea that you have to be 110% in or it’s not worth it, because you aren’t doing it well enough.

What happens is that people feel so unhappy with their current situation, they imagine what it would be like to be “perfect” or the “best” and they choose that as their goal. Think: going from 1,000 steps a day to 10,000, a non-gym goer deciding they need to go 6 times a week to be “fit”, someone who doesn’t run wanting to immediately run 30 miles a week, or deciding to cut out all sugar from your diet (don’t get me started on how absurd this is, but it is a common “diet hack”).

The truth is that any of these types of goals are completely unattainable because they are so far removed from the current reality. What then happens is slipping up once feels like a failure, or the goal is so overwhelming that they’re too scared to even start. Feelings of self-hate pop up again, and their brain then uses that as evidence that they’re incapable of change, so they end up back at square one feeling worse than when they began. We have ideals about what it means to be “fit” or “healthy” and all too frequently we mark ourselves down when we don’t match them, rather than doing what is feasible for our specific circumstances.

This behaviour applies to even the lowest levels of self-sabotage - such as not going for a walk even though we said we would, or over-indulging because we feel bad about our bodies - because in my opinion, it comes down to not believing we are good enough if we don’t give 110%. It’s a really vicious cycle to be trapped in because when this is all you’ve ever known, it feels impossible to get out of it.

How can we begin to break that cycle of self-sabotage?

As with anything, small steps. What would be most beneficial and sustainable is doing the little things everyday. The small things that don’t even seem worthwhile, but they are what make the difference. Small swaps make a huge difference. For example, switching from sugar in your tea to sweetener. Three takeaways a week down to one. A 10 minute walk every morning. These things really add up in the long run.

You don’t have to completely change your life to be “healthy” or “fit”. You may have to make compromises and be disciplined, but you don’t have to compromise who you are or give up the things you love.

https://www.balancelifewell.co.uk/blog-blw/selfsabotageexercise